


Give Sorrow Words

by fadedink



Series: Days of Christmas - 2011 [28]
Category: Star Trek (2009)
Genre: Canon Het Relationship, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Het
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-28
Updated: 2011-12-28
Packaged: 2017-10-28 08:30:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/305909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fadedink/pseuds/fadedink
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak whispers the o'er-fraught heart and bids it break.</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	Give Sorrow Words

**Author's Note:**

> The 'twenty-eighth day of Christmas' for [azewewish](http://azewewish.livejournal.com), just because. :) Title is from a quote by William Shakespeare.

Space is cold, vast, unforgiving. Grief for the loss of a parent is more so. That's all Nyota can think as she sits in the middle of the bed, blankets wrapped around her, and watches Spock.

He has always been a man of few words, but the death of his mother has made him even more taciturn. He limits his speech, retreating into silence and solitude, even now, months after the loss of his mother, his home, and most of his people.

She still wonders which loss grieves him most.

He has never been easy to read.

But she continues to try, glad that he allows her here, into his inner sanctum. Glad that he chooses to spend his off-duty time with her, even if it is mostly in silence and frenzied, almost desperate, embraces. It's the times after that worry her, the times like now, when he retreats behind a mask of cold logic, that frighten her.

"What are you thinking?" she finally asks, if only to break the silence that clings, oppressive in its weight. He merely shakes his head and continues to stare at the PADD in his lap.

It's frustrating.

At first, she had listened to her head. _Give him space. He'll come to you in time._ Her head, it seemed, was a fool, knowing nothing, for here they sat, on opposite sides of his quarters, and his walls were no closer to being breached then when he had erected them just after the destruction of the Narada and Nero's death.

So she decides, this once, to listen to her heart, for she knows he is close to breaking. The façade he presents to the world is just that: a façade.

She slips from the bed, lets the blankets fall, crosses the room on silent feet. He only looks up when she takes the PADD and sets it aside before settling on his lap. As she twines around him, her forehead pressed to the curve of his neck, he shifts.

And she knows he will speak, make some excuse.

"Tell me a memory of your mother," she says before he can speak.

He goes still. She knew he would. But she waits, patient, determined to outmaneuver him this time.

The silence stretches out, thin and painful, and she takes a breath. Inhales his scent. Feels the thud of his heart against hers.

"I barely remember my father," she says, when it's clear he won't speak. "I can remember a deep voice, strong hands... And his smell."

She laughs a soft laugh, letting the few memories, faded with time, swamp her. She can feel Spock tense against her.

"Nyota," he finally says, and something in his voice makes her lift her head. His dark eyes are bright in the low lighting, and she watches him squeeze them closed as lines of grief etch his face.

"I wish I had met her," she whispers, one hand framing his jaw, thumb brushing the curve of his bottom lip. She thinks of everyone lost in those awful few weeks - so many of her classmates, instructors, so many she knew and cared for - and lets the pain wash over her. Her lips touch his in a light, effortless caress. "Will you tell me about her?"

"I..." His voice cracks. As a single tear slips free, his arms convulse around her, crushing her to him, but she doesn't complain. She just holds him, lets him hold her.

"She was my mother," he whispers into her hair, voice broken and raw with loss and love. "And I miss her."


End file.
